HACK RANDOMNESS
by Tsukasa Beat
Summary: meh... A random story I made up. WARNING: ANIME BASHING!
1. poor mimiru!

OK. NEW! WARNING: Even though I like Tsukasa. TSUKASA AND MIMIRU BASHING! U've been warned.  
  
BTW, Refer to me as TB.  
  
Disclaimer: I don't Own N E THING in this Fic Except 4 the Mystery Character!  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Chapter 1: CROSSOVERS! YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Mimiru: Man, This stinks!  
  
Bear: Tell me about it!  
  
Sora: *Jumps in* oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooh! Looooooooooooooooooove! I BREAK IT! *Slashes away @ Mimiru*  
  
Mimiru: OW! *Stabs Sora and somehow makes contact with Sora's body instead of his Handblades*  
  
*Poof of smoke appears*  
  
???: Those who kill Will Feel the Painful Wrath of. COUNT SPANKULOT! *Slips on Red hot metal Glove, Exposes Mimiru's Butt and Whacks it non-stop*  
  
Mimiru: OW! IT BURRRRRRRRRRRNS!  
  
Spank: *Licks Mimiru's Butt*  
  
Mimiru: EEK! PERV! *Slaps Spank*  
  
Spank: *spanks more with hot glove*  
  
Mimiru: NOT MORE! OW!  
  
Spank: *Finally stops* Ur sexy! Wanna marry sumtime?  
  
Mimiru: NO!  
  
*Teletubbies appear*  
  
All: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!! *Attacks them*  
  
*all of a sudden. A GIANT MEATBALL APPEARS!*  
  
All: MEATBALLS EVIL BUT GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD!!!! *Eats meatball*  
  
???: *Gates in, But seems Weakened*  
  
Ok. That's enuff. Tsukasa Will b hurt in the next chapter and the character will be revealed! 


	2. DD Danger

TB: Meh. I'm baaaaaaaaaaaaaack!  
  
Tsukasa: *looks @ the chap title* O_O U WOULDN'T!  
  
TB: I would! BTW, Ima include TheVoices!  
  
TheVoices: :)  
  
TB: O_O no! Don't say it!  
  
TheVoices: SIT  
  
TB: *falls on face* grr. *shoves Tsukasa out into fic*  
  
~*$%*$%!~*~!%&*@#$*~$~$$%&$&%*~  
  
Chap. 2: DD danger  
  
(A/N: I don't have the .hack games but I no A LOT about the Characters on them. Don't quiz me!)  
  
*Kite, elk and Tsukasa look around in net slum*  
  
Kite: *throws a toaster Strudel @ elk*  
  
Elk: NOOOOOOOOOOOOO! TOASTER STRUDEL WITH ITS FRUITY GOODNESS! *Runs around like he's on fire*  
  
TB: *Snickers*  
  
*green guardians appear*  
  
Tsukasa: AHH! NOT THEM! THEY EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEVIL!!!!!!!  
  
Green guardians: *Start shooting DD spikes @ the 3some*  
  
5 Green guardians: *Terrorize TB and TheVoices*  
  
TheVoices: AHH!!! I USE MY EVIL AUTHORESS POWERSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!! *uses them on the guardians but no effect*  
  
TB: fool. lemme take care of them! *Fires 3 Spikes from back @ guardians but get hit by a DD spike* o_o  
  
*Tsukasa, Kite and Elk run from the guardians*  
  
Tsukasa: *Gets hit by a DD spike and Gets DD'ed* AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHH HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!  
  
TB: *Yells in pain as he Gets DD'ed*  
  
TheVoices: uhm. *pulls out Sword and Slices through the guardians*  
  
Tsukasa and TB: *Regenerate on top of Each other*  
  
TB: Get off of me! *pushes Tsukasa off*  
  
Tsukasa: I thought u liked me! *Throws a paperclip @ TB, but misses and hits Elk* T_T  
  
Paperclip: *hits Elk in the leg*  
  
Elk: MY LEG! IT'S BROKEN!!!! DIE, EVIL PAPERCLIP! *shoots a Fire Spell @ it*  
  
TB: *Climbs back up onto the overlook Platform* o.k.  
  
Skeith: *appears*  
  
TB: YAAH!!!!!!!!!! I H8 SKEITH!!!!! *Shudders* Skeeeeeeeith. *Shivers and is in a curled up ball, Twitching insanely*  
  
Skeith: *Paralyzes TB on his staff*  
  
TB: NO! U CAN'T HOLD ME! *Tries to teleport off of it but fails*  
  
Skeith: *turns staff around so TB faces him and DD's him*  
  
TB: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Skeith: *Gets Kite on his staff*  
  
Kite: *Yells in pain from the DD*  
  
Skeith: *DD's Tsukasa*  
  
Tsukasa: *Yells in bigger pain than TB OR Kite combined*  
  
Skeith: *DD's Elk then TheVoices*  
  
All: *Regenerate in a big Dogpile on the overlook platform*  
  
TB: I can't breathe! *Skitters out of pile, Pulls TheVoices out and pushes the rest off the platform*  
  
???: *appears and points spike arm @ Skeith, Fires and DD's him*  
  
TB: He. Has the same power as me!  
  
Kite: I HAVE THAT POWER, TOO!  
  
???: *looks @ TB and TheVoices* What? U haven't seen a DD b4? Name's Tarao. (A/N Tarao's a made-up Character I made 4 .hack//SIGN. He's not able to log out like Tsukasa and can DD. His type of player is Omni. That's ALL of the types of players put together in 1 body. MY MADE UP TYPE OF PLAYER!)  
  
TB: ehh. *Runs*  
  
That's the end of Chappy 2!!!!  
  
TheVoices: SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
TB: *falls on face 11 times* OW. C(*_*)  
  
Chap. 3 coming! Maha AND TB bashing combined! No flaming or I DD u!  
  
(A/N: DD means "Data Drain") 


	3. A new voice

TB: I'm baaaaaaaaaaaaaack!  
  
TheVoices: :)  
  
TB: Don't even try!  
  
TheVoices: I won't say it! She will! *points 2 Kagome*  
  
Kagome: Why am I here again?  
  
TheVoices: to Torture TB!  
  
Kagome: oh. Right! :)  
  
TB: O_O N E 1 BUT HER!!!!!!  
  
Kagome: SIT!  
  
TB: *Floats up and crashes HARD* Dammit. JUST START THE CHAPTER!!!!  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Ch. 3: A new voice  
  
^*^*^*^*^*WARNING! MINOR MAHA AND MODERATE TB BASHING! (mimi-chan's gonna LIKE the TB bashing!)*^*^*^*^*^  
  
Tsukasa: *Gates to Aura's Domain*  
  
Maha: *Appears*  
  
TB, Kagome and TheVoices: *Gate in*  
  
Maha: *Mouths sumthing*  
  
TB and TheVoices: huh? *Cleans out ear*  
  
Maha: *Mouths sumthing*  
  
TB: WHAT THE **** R U SAYING?!?  
  
Maha: *mouthing sumthing angrily @ TB*  
  
TB and TheVoices: *Jump down Maha's Throat (literally!)*  
  
Maha: *Choking and clutching onto neck in pain*  
  
*Whirring sounds coming out of Maha's mouth*  
  
TB and TheVoices: *jump out and return to the platform*  
  
Kagome: WHAT DID U DO TO THAT POOR KITTY?  
  
TB and TheVoices: u'll see.  
  
Kagome: Hmph! *shoves TB onto a footbridge high above* SIT BOY!  
  
TB: *Floats up and Crashes Through the Bridge and plunges into the River below*  
  
Mimi-chan: YAY!!!!  
  
Tsukasa: What was that for?  
  
Maha: huh? Can u guys hear me?  
  
TheVoices: YAY! IT WORKED!!!!! ^_^  
  
Kagome: *Gasp* That's What u and TB were doing?  
  
TheVoices: yup! ^_______^  
  
Maha: Where's TB?  
  
TheVoices: I dunno. I saw Kagome push him that way. *Points toward footbridge TB crashed through* I don't care. It's funny how TB yells as he falls!  
  
Mimi-chan: MORE TB BASHING!!!!!  
  
Tsukasa: ur an insane 1. *Gives mimi-chan Aromatic Grass*  
  
Mimi-chan: Graaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaass.  
  
TB: *Regenerates with flaming red eyes and stomps over to Kagome*  
  
Kagome: yeeeeeeeeeees?  
  
TB: u. U! *is about to attack Kagome*  
  
Maha and Tsukasa: *@ the same time* DON'T THINK ABOUT SAYING IT, KAGOME!  
  
Kagome: Hmph! *Grabs TB and puts him on a small platform above Mt. Everest, where @ the bottom are Jagged rocks and says loud and forcefully* SIT!  
  
TB: *Floats up and Crashes through, Lands on the Rocks and From the word, an avalanche pounds and buries TB alive*  
  
Maha: Kagome, Stop that! He did nothing to u! why r u doing that?  
  
Kagome: I dunno, I felt like it! ^_^  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
END OF CHAPTER  
  
TB: *in hospital*  
  
TheVoices: I'll take over 4 him. Review and mimi-chan, I hope ur happy! U put TB in the hospital!  
  
Mimi-chan: very! ^_^ He hurt Mimiru and Tsukasa! I like them! T_T I'm glad he's hurt!  
  
Next Chapter: SHOUT-OUTS! I'll accept those from Ch. 3 only. 


	4. The gf of TB: Goddess of torture

Disclaimer: I don't Own .hack or Inuyasha (n e 1 who hates N E of these animes will b hunted down and DD'ed.)

TB: *still in hospital*

TheVoices: umm… TB is still out. Plz stand by. *Holds up sign saying "plz stand by" and imitates elevator music*

V: *Appears*

(A/N: V (V-coke-girl on cokemusic.com) is my online girlfriend.)

Kagome: :)

V: U STUPID BITCH! TB'S MY B/F! I h8 u! *Bitch slaps kagome and Sucks the blood out of her*

Kagome: *Screams*

V: *Laughs evilly*

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ch. 4: The g/f of TB: Goddess of torture

Kagome: Were is Tb?

Miroku: He is in the hospital cuz o f you!

Kagome: :)

~*3 weeks later*~

TB: *walks out of the hospital accompanied by TheVoices and Tsukasa*

Tsukasa: You Know, you shouldnt let her treat you like that.

TB: *limping* Shut up.

TheVoices: *laughing insanley*

*TB, Tsukasa, and TheVoices arive at kagome's house*

*They walk in the house*

Kagome: :)

TB: NO!....Don't say it......!

Kagome: SIT

*Both inuyasha ,who was in the corner, and Tb crash into the floor*

Inuyasha: KAGOME! :(

Kagome: Sorry Inuyasha.

*Inuyasha leaves the room*

Kagome: :)............SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT.

TB: *Crashes into the floor once but makes a body imprint in the spot were he fell*

V: *appears*

Kagome: Who the hell are you?

V: Tb's g/f and you worst night mare.

2 b continued…

~~~~~~~~~~

TB: -_- I feel like v likes 2 see me get tortured… The main part of that Chapter was written by her. Sry that It didn't get real .hacky. n e way…

SHOUT-OUTS!

2 mimi-chan: U like that stuff? *Hands Mimi-Chan a lifetime supply of Aromatic Grass*

Mimi-chan: YAAAAAAAAY! ^______^ *Gets addicted 2 it*

2 Zazie: SERIOUS? WHOA! Where's ur Sense of humor? On a vacation?

2 hack: A shout-out is a reply or sumthing that's put in to emp it. Ur a maha Freak. Maha? HA HA! *imitates Nelson*

Pt. 2 coming up made by meeeeee! REVIEW OR GET DD'ED!


	5. Enter Tracea

ok... that last chap sucked...-_- WE GO .HACK AGAIN  
  
Chap. 5: Enter tracea  
  
*Tracea gates in on TB's Platform*  
  
TB: Welcome to the party!  
  
Tracea: ?  
  
TB: ack... *data Drains Voices and/or kicks her off of the platform into the action*  
  
*sora walks in and sees Voices*  
  
Sora: ooh! *PK's Voices*  
  
TB: lol I needed a laugh...  
  
Sora: r u talking to me, funny boy? *keeps his handblades out*  
  
TB: no. *extends handblades and jumps off of the platform, getting in a fight with sora* I thought u were gay at first. But then I realized... UR A CROSS DRESSER!!!!  
  
Sora: u no my secret?!? *cries and runs off*  
  
TB: wimp. *retracts handblades*  
  
*Tracea decides to blow the fic up in slow motion*  
  
TB: NO!!!! *tackles tracea* no blow up 4 u. my fic.  
  
Tracea: u ruin my fun!!! hmph. *pouts*  
  
TB: -_-  
  
*tsukasa walks in*  
  
TB: ooh. *imitating apu* let the party start! *Puts Skeith and cubia in the area Tsukasa's in*  
  
*tsukasa Yells in pain and TB laughs evilly*  
  
TB: I'm enjoying this...  
  
Tracea: don't hurt him! *data Drains TB, who yells in pain, then regenerates in where Skeith and cubia are*  
  
TB: ACK... *teleports back to the platform*  
  
Tracea: I wanna b a puuuuuuuuuuchi!!!  
  
TB: i made u immune to data drain, data rewrite and Data Delete.  
  
Tracea: aww... *pouts then Cries*  
  
TB: Here... *grenerates puchi*  
  
Tracea: YAY! *Grabs the puchi tight* I'm gonna love u and Squeeze u and never let u go!  
  
Krim and TB: ehh...  
  
TB: What is he doing here?  
  
Tracea: i want him here!  
  
TB: ok... *summons a tetra armor to hurt krim* heh heh heh...  
  
Tracea: waah!!!  
  
TB: geez... *throws Tracea in the heat and throws the puchi in as well* y data drain when u got others to do ur dirty work?  
  
Tracea: MY PUCHI!!!!!!!!!! WAAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
*TB Data drains morganna next*  
  
TB: I AM KING OF THE WORLD!!! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAA!!! *gets hit by a rock and falls off* ow. *gets slashed up by krim, then the tetra armor then tracea, who beats him with the Dead puchi* OW!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OW! OW! OWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Tracea: u killed my puchi!!! Ima kill u!  
  
TB: STOP! *jumps back onto the platform, bruised and cut up* ow.  
  
Krim: get him! *they all attack TB on the platform*  
  
TB: OW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *dies*  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
*glares @ mimi-chan* no flaming.  
  
Review! 


End file.
